Saturday, November 01, 2008

Cobo moro soro

This is the most crucial moment in this year for me ~~~> I'm going to sit for my semester final exam . Hard though but this make my day. I was force to study extremely hard. Actually should be study crazily. For me, this was like a dream and I will try my best in this dream so later might be able to reach another mind state in another way -> a better way. Study was the only path to keep me going and stop me from thinking negatively. Also, I was able to strengthen my social skill as my socializing really SUCKS.

Now what I have to care most is my body. My body condition can be said to be deteriorate during this whole week as I was eating more JUNK food with bad living habit as in take more meals than usual, sleep later than usual (once till 5.30a.m.), skip meals, less plain water intake, more carbonated drinks and so on. This is all the bad bad habit which make my conditions worse. I hate it but DO I HAVE A CHOICE? All I can do is try to minimize the impact of these health hazard on my body. Really scare if one day I fell ill severely and pass away due to this but right now, I think that this might just as well be true as I am already SICK. Should I tell HER? Maybe no... I preserve the RIGHT to let her know the truth of my weak and sick body.

If I let her know now, then sure will be much worried on me and can't concentrate on her study. I do not wish to make her suffer in the dilemma of worries and missing. I think this is the best that I can do now.

So, thinking too much make suffers too. No wonder my junior said I need a psychology to amend my habits. Is that WHAT I want? Maybe but this is not true. I DO NOT NEED one...Haha... My psychology state is quite stable and what I need is just guidance and care from friends and other individuals. I need to release my stress out by MAYBE crying out loud? Walking excessively? Study fanatically? Eating excessively? etc.

Listen to music